“A drunk mans words are a sober man's thoughts.”
--Steve Fergosi
“An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.”
--Ernest Hemingway
“To alcohol... The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.”
--Homer Simpson
“I'm not drunk, all right. I just have a speech impediment ... and a stomach virus ... and an inner ear infection.”
--Brian the dog from Family Guy
“Drinking is a way of ending the day.”
--Earnest Hemingway.
“Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.”
--Anonymous
“A drink a day keeps the shrink away.”
--Edward Abbey
“A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started."
--Henny Youngman
"I'm not drunk. I'm just trying to walk like Jack Sparrow."
--Anonymous
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